Well, I desert Xanga pretty much now. I have found no use left in it. But, I have to write some feelings down, and I realized that here is the best place to do it at.

My parents hate me. Ha. What interesting news, huh? They have seemed to disappear from my life. Meaning, Now all I get is "Michele, get off youre lazy ass and do something.." WTF? Parents arent supposed to treat their kids like their shit. No I love you Michele, or Please Michele, Its just MICHELE DO IT OR GET THE FUCK OUT. They actually wanted me to leave. HA. A major part of this is my father.. The slight part would be my mother sometimes. She however, Is not mean at all. But, she does have a tendency to take his side over things. I love her though...But I have no love left for him. To me, He's just someone thats related to me. I have no use left for him.

As for another thing..John and I are doing well. He still hasnt asked me yet, But I know he's getting there. He's waiting for the right moment, in which, you cant rush a relationship, you know. The more and more I cant wait, The more I understand. I think thats where I screwed up in the past. You cant talk to someone within a few hours and get to know them. Them things take time..And It finally hit me. However, I feel that we grow closer each day, And I already love him more than anything. He means the world to me, and actually doesnt want to jump my bones like everyone else has in the past. The problem is, my f.a.t.h.e.r  hates him because he's 20. But see, It doesnt matter what he thinks, Just what I think. Imma be with him no matter what. He inspires me, and its almost as if he's taken a toll on me. I even began writing more, and well, its coming along too. MOST of it isnt too terribly bad, But I still could use some improvement. However, That also takes time, and I continue to deepen my knowledge on such things. Im more of an art person though. At least I draw better than I write. That could be a good thing in the near-distant future.

Time keeps going by, day in day out.. Summer is almost over. School will be back in a few days, And honestly, Im looking forward to it. Im going to be a junior this year, and Im looking forward to graduation in a couple years. I only have 2 years left, and I'll be done with school. I love it, but it does get boring sometimes. It however, gets you somewhere in life, and I dont want to be a failure like my 2 older sisters. They chose to fuck up their life, and Im not going to. My parents call me a failure, but..Im not going to let it get me down, Because I know that Im not. I do my best in everything that I do, and thats all anyone can do, right? I do good in school, I may not make straight A's, but hell, I do good enough.. I make good grades though, good enough to get me somewhere. My friends have also had an influence on me, If it wasnt for them, I probably would have gotten out of school by now. At least I know someone is counting on me..Like I count on myself.

I cant wait to turn 17. Im looking forward to that, Imma have me a great job next summer. Imma be making 8.00/hour. Its amazing I know, and I get to have my own air-conditioned office. Thanks to my wonderful Aunt Beverly. I couldnt live if it wasnt for her. She does everything in the world for me, And I love her dearly. She means everything to me aswell, and I thank her very much for the job. If it wasnt for her, I couldnt have it.

That is all for now. I think this is the longest post yet. Congratulations to me. =]